“Do we have to celebrate Valentine’s Day?” That’s what our 14-year-old son asked me this time last year. When I was his age, I loved celebrating with a special breakfast – including red and pink sprinkled donuts – and small gifts and cards exchanged between my parents and siblings. My enthusiasm waned, however, as I got older and went off to college and then Washington, D.C., with no prospects for love and marriage. My parents tried to make the day special with their packages and cards throughout my years of being single. But I needed something more.
I thought having a boyfriend, and eventually a husband, was what I most needed to be happy. I thought I needed a change of status. What I really needed was a change of heart. Valentine’s Day used to stir self-pity in me. In that frame of mind, even a boyfriend couldn’t fix what ailed me. Far from leaving me in a position to love others, it left me sulking and angry. Beneath tears and sorrow was the belief that I deserved what other people were getting. It wasn’t just pride. I envied what they had.
That was no way to spend the day. But God was patient. I’ve written before about how He used people to speak truth to me, pulling me out of myself to focus on others. And He used my parents, who prayed for me during those long years of waiting.
Now that we’re parents of young adults, we want to do for them what our parents did for us. But we want to be even more intentional by letting Scripture direct what we’re praying for. Rather than vague requests for a husband for our daughter and a wife for our son, we want to pray not “Our will be done,” but “Your will be done.” The way to know we’re praying in step with God’s will is to pray His Word.
That’s why we’ve created a free PDF guide to praying for your adult children. Bearing Fruit in Every Good Work includes 20 Bible passages with short sample prayers. and one longer example of how you can incorporate verses into your prayers for your adult children. The printable guide is ideal to keep near your Bible, working through the list over several days or weeks. The passages include prayers for faith and trust in the Lord, walking in wisdom, being transformed through the renewing of their minds, rejoicing in suffering that leads to hope, Christ-like humility, growth in maturity, and more toward the goal of bearing fruit in every good work.
What will you do to encourage your unmarried adult children this Valentine’s Day? Gifts and cards are a delightful way to encourage them and show your love. Why not add to that something infinitely more valuable this February 14 and every day going forward?